7.7 - The Green Mile

I came across this book by accident when surfing the internet. From the soundtrack to the movie to the book, I finally looked it up on the library page and, having nothing better to read, I put it first on my summer reading list...

The story, which takes place in 1932 in America, is told from the view of Paul Edgecombe a retired prison guard. He speaks of the days when he worked in block E of the Cold Mountain Penitentiary, watching over prisoners who were sentenced to death on the electric chair. The days, when his job was to lead criminals across the Green Mile to their certain death at its end. The story evolves around the case of John Coffey, a prisoner much different from the usual tough-looking psychopaths that end up in one of the cells which line the Green Mile. Sentenced to death for raping and killing two girls, John Coffey has his own secrets to hide. Secrets, that can forever change the lives of his fellow prisoners and his guards on block E.

There is so much I could say about this book, but I am afraid that I would spoil the exciting parts if I revealed too much, as it has so many twists, most of them being quite predictable, some of them extremely unpredictable and surprising.
It took some time for me to get used to the different time this story took place at and after reading so many science fiction and fantasy novels I had to often remind myself that: "no, Coffey isn´t going to turn into a virus-infected vampire" and: "no, Mr. Jingles cannot communicate with people using his mind"... But, although I didn´t expect it, this book had its own type of "magic" and plenty of paranormal aspects. The fact that the story was set in the past made it seem even more real.
And then there is the ending, the most unexpected melancholy ending. I seemed to have forgotten that not every book ends well. Neither can I say that the ending was bad. It was depressing and happy, in that hopeful kind of way, at the same time. With the question: What comes after death? hanging in my mind, I put the book down.
"The Green Mile" is one of those books in which the author pays great attention to characters. Each of them had their own unique way of dealing with problems and it was interesting watching them evolve in the prescence of other characters. Once again, I enjoyed making predictions of what will happen next and how certain characters will react to this. I guess the author managed to develop such realistic characters by just "telling the story as it was (or would be, in this case)": by letting the criminals use the specific language and words criminals would use when speaking, by describing the feelings of Paul as a prison guard would describe them, by adding small details from the daily life of the people that lived in the 20 th century- books, movies,  the clothes they wore, the devices they used: everything seemed so realistic.
I have very mixed feelings for this book, all I can say is that it affected my life in some strange undefinable way. The story was extremely gripping: there was always that kind of "tension", the feeling that something bad is going to happen, that it will all go wrong, that kept me reading. And that ending... I still feel like there is so many questions that were left unanswered. But, afterall, that is what all good books do: they leave you thinking about them even after you´re done reading.
I guess everyone should read this book and decide for themselves whether they like it or not, because I cannot assign it to any specific genre or group of people (except that I probably wouldn´t recommend it to a ten-year-old: it is a story about the death of the death-sentenced!), without ignoring the fact that it has certain unique aspects that just simply wouldn´t fit. Ignoring these aspects, I´d probably say it´s a detective-horror story, but believe me, it is much, much more than that.





www.coverbrowser.com 

26.6 - The Passage

 After having come upon this book when browsing in the bookshop, I spent a long time trying to decide whether to buy it or not. I considered the cover, the title, read the blurb and a few pages of the story and this book "spoke" to me. From the moment I picked it up, I felt a strong desire to read this book. Unfortunately, I chose a different book in the bookshop, dismissing "The Passage" as "too hard and too long", making one of the worst mistakes in my bookshelfer´s life. Of course, I couldn´t stop myself- the book seemed too good to be left behind never to be read or reviewed- and I had to take the "hard way", which meant waiting for the book to be in the library and then travelling to some far-away place to check it out...

io9.com

"The Passage" is a novel (part of a planned trilogy) by Justin Cronin. The story is told from many points of view and is set mostly in the future. It speaks of a dangerous virus created by the USA army which is meant to prolong the lives of humans it infects, strenghten their immune systems and cure all illness. Unfortunately, this virus has a few side effects: the humans that get infected turn into evil blood-sucking, meat-eating, vampire-like beings.
In the begging, the book follows the story of agent Wolgast, who works for the FBI as a special agent for a secret project under the code name "Noah". His job is to collect death-sentenced prisoners persuading them to undergo the testing of this dangerous virus without telling them what they are up against. These prisoners, most of them choosing a "secret new job" over death, are then transported to the headquarters in Colorado where they are injected with the virus, strictly guarded and observed 24 hours a day. So far, all 12 test subjects were adults. Amy Harper Bellafonte is a 6 year old orphan girl who was the first child chosen to be injected with a new version of the virus. That is when things start going wrong.
For ages the guards of each of the tweleve  subjects have been having strange dreams which were, in some strange sinister way, connected to the monsters they were watching over. They all try to avoid talking about the whispers they hear in the presence of the subjects and the terrible nightmares they get every time they fall asleep, but they all know they are real- a huge unpleasant part of taking this job.
One night, after Amy gets injected with the virus, the subjects escape and twelve blood-sucking, meat-eating, vampire-like beasts are unleashed onto the world. What´s worse? Anyone they bite gets infected too. Wolgast manages to escape with Amy. Ever since they first met he couldn´t help but asocciate her with his dead daughter, feeling quite guilty for taking a six-year-old orphan girl to undergo the testing of an unknown virus, a pocedure only death-sentenced criminals were asked to undergo, and face almost certain death in the process. Surprisingly, Amy survived, and she is different from the other subjects: her skin doesn´t glow, she doesn´t feel hunger for raw meat and she doesn´t run around destroying cities and killing people. Amy has the modified version of the virus.
The story then skips a few years into the future, describing the aftermath of the virus epidemic. The virus spread quickly across America, forcing people to flee towns and send their children to special "camps" where they were guarded and kept safe from the infected. The inhabitants of these camps later estabilished colonies living behind tall walls guarded by lights, nets and barbed wires. These were often the only people that survived, living cut off from the outside world but safe from the virus. Unfortunately, nothing lasts forever. The batteries that power the lights which have for so long protected the people from the infected, are running out and when the lights go out, there will be nothing left to protect them from the outside world and the evil that lives behing the walls of the colony.

I was excited when I finally found this book sitting on the shelf in the library and I couldn´t wait to start reading. The beggining was amazing- the way the author described the feelings of the characters, weaving their personal stories in with the whole- it was unbelievably extraordinary! I loved the parts where the infected subjects spoke to their guards through whispers and nightmares and I quickly got dragged into the story. I was a bit disappointed when the book skipped into the future at a particularly exciting part though, and even more disappointed when I got introduced to the many inhabitants of the colony- there were too many of them and it was way too confusing and hard to keep track of who was who. However, I really appreciate the author´s creativity; the way he included maps and documents in the story instead of telling the reader straight away what was goin on. This is one of the books that made me think while reading, letting me use my imagination and forcing me to put pieces of the "puzzle" together to help me understand what was going on. Towards the end I was about to put the book down and give up, as I thought that the ending was too predictable and that there was no point in reading on- I suspected it would end with the classic "happy ending"- they all get married, have children and live happy lives after defeating the infected- it turns out that I was wrong: my "happy ending" suspicion was turned down by two simple words in the last sentence of the entire book- once again the author left the reader with something to think about, a piece of the puzzle which is different for everybody, leaving him to feel worried for the characters, and that is something I think happens quite a lot in this book. I recommend "The Passage" to anyone and everyone- YOU HAVE TO READ THIS! Really, if you like exciting books that make you think and help you use your imagination, read "The Passage"- and don´t stop reading, it´s definitely worth it!

16.5 - LIFE

-Humankind:

We all begin the same,

A heartbeat,

A twitch,

A single breath:

LIFE

Who?

When?

How?

Where? 

Why?

Questions, answers

Answers that we search for,

Answers that we want,

Answers that we need,

Answers that we cannot get.

From the moment of our births,

From the very first breath,

The questions stay.

From their first visit,

From the first simple touch,

They follow us every day. 

From the first hint of their whispers,

From the start of potential "adulthood"

They will never go away.

Who?

When?

How?

Where? 

Why?

Dearest,

Do not ponder,

Do not seek,

Do not weep,

Do not wonder.

This is what I wish to leave behind,

My leagacy,

Your inheritance,

To whoever may happen to find,

A lifetime´s knowledge,

The truth,

To replace the unanswered questions,

The longing,

The emptiness,

In your mind. 

Dearest,

Do not search for the impossible,

Do not grow hungry for explanations,

For the questions who´s answers you so long for,

Were meant to be left unanswered.

LIFE

Who?

When?

How? 

Where?

Why? 

Living beings, us

Infinite time, always

Felicity, a better feeling

Earth, our home

The Unknown.

-Nobody

12.5 - My Life on a Bookshelf

1.5 - The Secrets of The Immortal Nicholas Flamel (book 1, 2)

"The Alchemyst" and "The Magician" ar the first two books of "The Secrets of The Immortal Nicholas Flamel" series written by Michael Scott.
In the first book we are introduced to the main characters: Sophie and Josh, two twins that live in San Francisco. Their parents work as archaeologists so they travell a lot, which means that Sophie and Josh are often left with one of their relatives. They both have jobs on the same street- Sophie works in a coffee shop, and Josh works in a bookshop. While talking on the phone with her friend, Sophie notices a strange black car which has stopped infront of the bookshop across the street. Several minutes later explosions can be heard from inside the bookshop. Meanwhile, Nick Fleming, the owner of the bookshop, is fighting with a strange short man in a black suit. Josh watches as the two men throw strange "balls of glowing energy" at each other. Soon Sophie enters the bookshop to see what was going on. It turns out that what the man wanted was a small but powerfull book called the Codex. He wrenches it out of Joshe´s hand and leaves. As soon as he is gone, Nick runs to hide in the basement with the twins. There he explains everything: The man that took the book was called John Dee, he is a powerfull immortal magician. The book, the Codex, was writen thousands of years ago by Abraham the Mage and holds the secret to immortal life as well as many other secrets including those that can destroy the world. He, Nick Fleming, is really the famous French Alchemyst Nicholas Flamel. He and his wife Perenelle, who owns the coffee shop, were asked to guard the book from people like John Dee who would use it to destroy the world. John Dee now has the book and he took Perenelle with him on his way from the bookshop. Fortunately, Josh managed to tear two pages from the Codex when John Dee took it from him, and theese two pages just happen to be the most important ones.


---------WARNING: If you want to read the first book, do not read on:  SCROLL DOWN---------------

The twins learn about magic and the Elders, beings that occupied the Earth long before humans. They get to meet one of them, Scatach, the warrior. Nicholas knows that Dee will be after the last two pages tof the Codex, so he and Scatach take the twins to Hekate, another of the Elders who lives in a huge tree in her own "shadowrealm", a kingdom made and ruled over by her. On the way they encounter a giant flock of black birds which try to destroy their car- John Dee managed to get the Morrigan, the crow godess on his side. When they finally reach Hekate´s magical shadowrealm, Nicholas discovers that the twins are in one of the many prophecies in the Codex. So he asks Hekate to awaken Sophie´s magical powers. While sophie undertakes the painfull complicated awakening process, Dee, The Morrigan and Bastet, the cat godess attack the shadowrealm. In the end, Dee destroys the Ygdrasill, the giant tree which is magically linked with Hekate. Fortunately, Flamel, Scatach and the twins manage to escape in time. They go to The Witch of Endor, Scatach´s grandmother, where Sophie with her newly awakened magical powers is taught how to control the air element. They are not safe for long, however, as Dee soon returns with an army of walking dead to attack again. Once again, Flamel and the twins escape, this time through a ley gate, a magical link between two places which can be acessed by mirrors, which takes them far away into a cathedral in Paris.

In "The Magician", the second book, Flamel, the twins and Scatach have to fight their way out of the Sacré-coeur cathedral. Sophie´s knowledge of the magic of air, given to her by The Witch of Endor, and Scatach´s fighting skills help them escape Machiavelli, an Italian magician hired by Dee. They hide in the house of Francis Saint-Germain, a famous singer who controls the fire element, and his wife, Scatach´s old friend, Joanne of Ark. Dee and Machiavelli team up and call the Valkyries, three female warriors and the only beings that  are able to defeat Scatach. Flamel gives Josh the remaining pages of the Codex and a sword, Clarent, the twin of Excalibur with which Dee destroyed the Ygdrasill in book one. Dee flies to Paris and he and Machiavelli consult the Valkyries, persuading them to call the Nidhog, a nearly undefeatable monster which was, until Dee destroyed it, trapped in the roots of the Ygdrasill.

--------------------------------------END OF WARNING------------------------------------------------

"The Secrets of The Immortal Nicholas Flamel" is in style and in genre very similar to "Percy Jackson and The Olympians" series, where creatures and people from legends and mythologies appear in modern-day reality. However, I guess I would characterize "The Alchemyst" and "The Magician" as a bit more lively than the Percy Jackson series. Not in writing style, but in content. I wonder how the author managed to fit so much information into one book without confusing the reader. Everything is explained clearly without using too many words and the book flows very well. I read the first book in English and I finished it within three days. "The Magician" didn´t go by as fast as "The Alchemyst", perhaps because I read the Czech translation which didn´t flow that well. However, I feel as if the books lack some of the humour and playfullness of the Percy Jackson books, so what they made in content, they lose in writing style. I reccomend the books to all Percy Jackson fans, I would have a hard time trying to pick between the two series.



        booksntea.wordpress.com                  www.dillonscott.com 

23.4 - The Inheritance Cycle

I´ve spent the past seven months reading the four books of "The Inheritance cycle" by Christopher Paolini. The series consist of: "Eragon", "Eldest", "Brisingr" and "Inheritance". The first book, "Eragon" was made into a not-so-well-known movie by the same name.
The books are set in Alagaesia, a fictional Empire ruled by a dictator king, Galbatorix, who killed the Dragon Riders that once protected the land and took over the throne. Eragon, the main character, lives in a valley at the far north of Alagaesia. His mother left him with his uncle, Garrow, when Eragon was a baby, so he grew up with his cousin, uncle and aunt on a farm in a small village called Carvahall. One day, while hunting, Eragon finds a strange blue stone lying on the ground in the forest. He brings it back to his village. The stone turns out to be a dragon egg. When his dragon, Saphira, hatches, Eragon hides her in the forest to protect her from the villagers. Despite his effort to keep Saphira a secret, one of the villagers, Brom, an old story-teller soon finds out. Brom tells Eragon more about the Dragon Riders and introduces him to the unbelievable truth that he has now become the last free Dragon Dider in Alagaesia (Galbatorix is also a Dragon Rider- he betrayed the others, killed their dragons and he and the Forsworn, riders that have joined his side, took over Alagaesia). Unfortunately, Brom isn´t the only one to know about the dragon, Ra´zacs, black-hooded human-meat-eating monsters and spies of the king turn up in Carvahall one day and appear to be looking for something. When Saphira senses the Ra´zac in Carvahall she takes Eragon on a flight far away, guided by instinctive anger towards the monsters. When they return, Eragon finds his uncle dead and their farm burnt down- the Ra´zacs are looking for him. Eragon, Saphira and Brom have to leave Carvahall at once. They embark on a journey to find the Ra´zacs and avenge Garrow´s death on which Eragon learns more about the Dragon Riders and what it means to be one of them. Brom introduces him to magic and mind reading and teaches him how to handle a sword. Eragon is also told about the Varden, the rebels that are planning to overthrow Galbatorix, which begins Eragon´s (And Saphira´s) long adventure full of battles, plots and responsibilities with one ultimate goal: to kill Galbatorix.

The Inheritance cycle is the second (The first being "Chronicles of Narnia" by C.S Lewis) "fantasy, Fantasy" series I´ve read. Typical fantasy novel elements are included: elves, magic, Urgals (muscular humans with horns), magicians and, of course, dragons. The series resembles J.R.R.Tolkein´s "Lord of the Rings" (or at least resembles what I have heard of the "Lord of the Rings"). Despite the unoriginal overall idea, The Inheritance cycle has something to it which kept me reading throughout the course of seven months. The author does an excellent job at describing- the setting, the feelings, the whole story seems so real. Details like the language of each of the races of Alagaesia (Elves, Urgals, Dwarves...) are included and add to the "real-ness". It is easy to get pulled into the story. Reading The Inheritance cycle requires a lot of concentration, though, as it is sometimes hard to take in all the details and the books cannot be read in a hurry. Highly reccomended as great example of the classic fantasy genre! (If you have seen the movie, please read the book(s), it is so much better and the movie, as it is with nearly all of the movies based on books, leaves out a lot of the important parts).

www.bookfan.eu

                       

presage.blog.cz

dauntlessmedia.net

hrablik.blog.cz

22.4 - Neverwhere

"Neverwhere" is a fantasy novel by Neil Gaiman. The story takes place in London and is closely linked with the London underground. When Richard Mayhew, the main character, moves to this city, he has a perfect life- a good job, a girlfriend he loves, and everything he needs. Like it is in most stories, nothing lasts forever, and Richard´s life suddenly takes a turn when on his way to an important dinner with his girlfriend, Jessica, and her boss, Richard encounters a half-dead injured red-headed girl lying on the pavement next to a brick house. Richard, seeing that the girl is unconscious, takes her and carries her to his apartment, abandoning Jessica and her formal dinner. The next morning two men in dark suits, Mister Vandemar and Mister Croup, come ringing Richard´s doorbell asking for a girl called Door. Richard answer´s that no, he doesn´t know a girl called Door, while knowing that the girl they are looking for is hiding in his bathroom. It the next few days Richard helps Door find someone that will help her- The Marquis de Carabas, a liar a traitor and a dealer who Door, for some reason, trusts, and he leaves her with this man, saying goodbye somewhat too quickly to be considered proper. Richard then discovers that by the small act of kindness he did for Door by taking her to his apartment, he managed to get Jessica to dump him. As if this wasn´t enough, Mister Vandemar and Mister Croup, who turn out to be hired assassins, find out that Richard lied to them and put a curse on him, making him invisible to the outside world. People no longer hear him, he looses his job, someone moves into his apartment, and it is like if Richard Mayhew never existed. Furious and helpless, Richard meets a homeless man on the street who can hear him. He asks for help and gets dragged into a world of dirty sewers and rats, a world where magic mixes with reality and life is a constant fight for survival, a world of the London underground. He meets Door and the Marquis again and finds out that Door´s family was killed by Mister Vandemar and Mister Croup. Along with Door, Marquis and Hunter, a bodyguard who Door hired to protect her from the assassins, he embarks on a quest to avenge the death of Door´s family members and to get his life back.

This book is a masterpiece. The way Gaiman tells the story, playing with every word, choosing those that will fit the situation best, is extraordinary. The story flows very well and those 400 pages go by quicker than you would think. It is very original- a city below a city. I like how the author chose to leave some things, details mostly, hidden for the reader to figure them out for himself. He encourages readers to use their imagination by focusing only on the most distinct details and not overly describing the unimportatnt. Something that I didn´t like about this book was the predictable ending- it was too easy to guess what will happen. This was quite a disappointment as the rest of the book was completely UNpredictable, with evil waiting behind every corner and the strange atmosphere hanging in the air making you think that everything is possible. In it´s own way, "Neverwhere" is similar to Incarceron, mostly in the setting of the story- the depressing underground. The author also mentions actual places, the underground stations of London, making the unrealistc sometimes even exaggerated story seem more "real". This book is definitely worth a read. Reccomended to older readers (aged 11-12 and above), who like playfully written stories.

katiesbookblog.blogspot.com

18.2 - Čechům, a všem lidem na této planetě

Vážení občané České republiky a obyvatelé planety Země,

Před pár měsíci jsem se s rodinou přistěhovala zpátky do své rodné země. Musím říct, že od té doby mám menší problémy s touhle společností. Předtím než rozepíšu své názory na tento stát, ráda bych upozornila, že nechci svým dopisem nikoho ponižovat, na nikoho ukazovat ani svádět vinu na konkrétní osoby. Tento dopis je určen pouze k zamyšlení, k zamyšlení a pochopení.

Naše společnost se skládá z uzavřených skupin, jež spojují negativní či pozitivní vztahy. Každá skupina lidí má své názory, svou víru, svá práva. Na tom není nic špatného, problém nastane tehdy, když se na Českou republiku podíváte jako stát. Nedržíme při sobě a občas jsme tak zabráni do našeho vlastního názoru, že odmítáme brát ohled na a snažit se pochopit názory druhých. Jsou naše názory opravdu natolik odlišné, že nám brání přijímat všeobecný pohled na "dobro" a "zlo"? Neexistuje alespoň něco, na čem bychom se mohli shodnout?

Dále by asi stálo za to zmínit pár současných globálních problémů. Vezměme si například chudobu v rozvojových zemích. V současnosti existuje mnoho organizací, které pomáhají tento problém řešit. Jakožto dcera diplomata, jsem chudobu viděla na vlastní oči v zemích, kde jsem vyrůstala. Od mala mě učili, že si navzájem máme pomáhat. Dělala jsem projekty a prezentace na řešení těchto problémů a neustále mi připomínali, jak je důležité snažit se je vyřešit. Zarazilo mě, že tady v České republice se tohle vůbec za důležité nepokládá- nebo snad ano? Pokud jsem na omylu, tak už i fakt, že jsem o takovýchto vážných problémech zde v Česku nebyla informována, stojí za zamyšlení. Neměli bychom těmto problémům věnovat větší pozornost? Toto je jen jeden příklad z mnoha. Co třeba ohrožené druhy rostlin a zvířat, globální oteplování, hlad, rovnoprávnost nebo vzdělání v rozvojových zemích?

Jako další příklad si vezmu globální oteplování. Ano, hodně lidí v něj nevěří a ještě se pořád spekuluje o tom, jestli si globální oteplování zaviňujeme sami, nebo jestli pouze přichází opakované teplé období. Nezáleží na tom, jestli věříme v to, že se naše planeta otepluje naší vlastní vinou, i přes to dosti škodíme přírodě. Vymírají zvířata a rostliny, mizí neobnovitelné zdroje a znečišťuje se životní prostředí. Jak k tomu přispíváme? Rozsvícením světla. Využíváme spoustu energie. Tímto zcela nepatrným pohybem, tak stupidně jednoduchým natažením ruky na vypínač, začneme řetězovou reakci. Elektrická energie, jež tuto žárovku pohání, se vyrábí v kilometry vzdálených elektrárnách. Existuje mnoho způsobů, jak tuto energii vyprodukovat, dnes se však nejčastěji pálí tzv. fosilní paliva, tedy ropa, uhlí nebo plyn. Tento levný a efektivní způsob výroby energie je noční můrou pro naše životní prostředí. Uhlí, ropa a plyn jakožto neobnovitelné zdroj energie, brzy vyprchají a nebudeme mít z čeho energii vyrábět. Další nevýhodou fosilních elektráren jsou emise. Škodlivé výpary škodí jak nám, tak ostatním živým tvorům v našem okolí. V roce 2009 tepelné elektrárny, tedy elektrárny využívající buďto spalování fosilních paliv, nebo způsobem více šetrném k životnímu prostředí využívají tepla ze země (geotermální elektrárny), vytvářely 63,3% energie pro naši zemi. V porovnání s ostatními zeměmi jsme na tom ještě dobře, není ale důvod, proč bychom jim neměli jít příkladem a snažit se snížit procento energie na našem území vyrobeno spalováním neobnovitelných zdrojů.

Zamysleme se někdy nad následky našich činů. Žijeme v nadbytku a pořád toho chceme víc! Zkusme se porovnat s obyvateli rozvojových států a přemýšlet nad tím, o kolik lépe se máme mi než oni. Není to spravedlivé. Z ekologického hlediska více věcí a jídla znamená více energie na převážení a vypěstování potravin nebo vyrobení produktu. Z morálního hlediska cítím pocit viny. Nikdo z nás neovlivní kde, a kdy se narodí a proto by ti šťastlivci, kteří mají vše, na co si jen vzpomenou, měli pomáhat chudším lidem trpícím hladem a žízní. Toto je ten hlavní problém české společnosti. Zdá se mi, že si nedokážeme navzájem pomáhat a učit se jeden od druhého. Existuje jen „JÁ“ a to, co mi chybí.

Sama jsem takto často jednala. Na rozdíl od ostatních jsem ale věděla, že existují problémy, které jsou důležitější než mé osobní potřeby. Těch 8 let mého života, které jsem strávila v zahraničí, jsem byla neustále poučována o našich globálních problémech. Místo toho abych se snažila je řešit, jsem je ignorovala. Život v této společnosti mě ale přinutil jednat- nelíbí se mi jak ignorujeme pravdu. Od teďka přestanu chtít a začnu dávat. Přestanu používat elektřinu, budu recyklovat odpad a pěstovat si své vlastní jídlo. Ano, možná je mi jen 13 let a většina z vás si asi říká, jak něco tak vážného můžu chápat a snažit se to vyřešit. Otázka zní: „Když ne já, tak kdo?“

Děkuji za pozornost,

Johana Jarkulischová

  

9.2

I Stand Alone

Who am I?
The voice calling out to the darkness.
The everlasting haze
that precedes the loneliness
-the remorse-
that is yet to come.

I wail
I whisper
I scream
I cry
I weep
I love

I stand alone

In a sea of identical thoughts.
There is none like me
For all I fear is forced to fear me.

Reality,
Something I used to know.
Of all the useless words,
As their numbers grow,
It stands alone, like I now stand,
Left without meaning
Like a sketch in the sand.

The wrong and the right,
The black and the white,
No longer exist.

Gray,
the only color I see,
for all have merged
to create thee.

I stand alone

On a decaying bridge.
Unable to move,
Which is all I wish.

All kings,
All the poets,
The writers,
The bards.
The ever-lost dreamers,
The ones who are smart.
The curious,
The knowing,
The askers,
The answers
The music that whispers,
To the hearts of the dancers.

All them I have visited,
all them I have feared,
all of them knew me,
as their decisions neared.

I have seen,
I have learned,
I have always been.

All wish I were no more,
For I, Doubt

Stand alone.